


Only to me you cannot lie

by Mimisempai



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Developing Relationship, Getting Together, Getting to Know Each Other, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pre-Slash, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-08
Updated: 2020-08-08
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:08:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,838
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25789366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mimisempai/pseuds/Mimisempai
Summary: "Our family has a special gift: if you meet your soulmate, from the day your souls connect with love, you can never lie to them."That's what Sonny's grandmother once said to him.30 years later Sonny is still desperate not to have met his soul mate.But sometimes it only takes a lie to change everything...Prompt : You cannot lie to your soulmate
Relationships: Rafael Barba/Dominick "Sonny" Carisi Jr.
Comments: 11
Kudos: 61
Collections: Barisi Soulmate Bingo





	Only to me you cannot lie

_"Sonny, my boy, listen carefully to what I'm going to tell you. Do you know what it means to have a soulmate?"_

_"Yes, Nonna, it's someone you love and share everything with."_

_"Not quite, my sunshine, it's a person with whom you share an intense connection all your life from the moment your souls connect, it can be just professional, friendly or loving. However, our family has a special gift: if you meet your soulmate, from the day your souls connect with love, you can never lie to them."_

_"And will that be the case for this person, too?"_

_"No, your soulmate won't have the same gift. From the day your souls connect, they will never be able to hurt you in any way, neither physically nor verbally, and they will be pushed to do everything to make you happy. But remember Sonny, it can only be with love. That's the only way your gifts will be triggered."_

_"Wow, I can't wait to grow up and meet my soulmate then!"_

_"Oh Sonny, I'm sure your soulmate will be thrilled to have you in his life."_

_If ever I find my soulmate_ , Sonny thought 30 years later. Oh, he had met people, but each time it ended badly. The way he had been hurt proved to him that none of these people couldn't be his potential soulmate.

In fact, he had thought he would never experience the intense connection that his grandmother had talked about until he came to this precinct and met a certain Rafael Barba.

From day one he had been attracted to the man like a bear to a honey pot. Sonny couldn't help but want to impress the ADA. Even though there was no chance that the man would feel anything for him thought Sonny. 

The proof was the way Barba constantly belittled him. Sonny gritted his teeth, thinking back to some of their face-to-face encounters.

_"Am I right, counselor?"_

_"Seldom"_

Or the time Sonny had tried to counter with good arguments and the ADA had replied with:

_"Booyah Fordham Law!"_

And yet Sonny held on because he couldn't help it.

He took it, and he kept going because Sonny knew he had a lot to learn from Barba.

That's why he took his courage and asked him if he could follow him on a case. Expecting a refusal, he was pleasantly surprised that Barba accepted. 

He had accompanied Barba throughout the whole trial and seeing him work closely, seeing how his brain worked was exhilarating, but even more exhilarating for Sonny was the fact that he had been able to be a part of the process and even helpful to Barba. 

When he was thanked by Barba, the deep joy he felt made him realize that he had it bad. 

However, since this case, the ADA seemed to have mellowed a bit. Oh, he was still throwing a few punches, but Sonny felt it was like a game to Rafael. Like he was trying to provoke Sonny in a friendly way.

There was something in Rafael's eyes that softened every comment that was meant to be sharp. 

Sonny almost began to hope that something might be possible. That maybe Rafael was starting to like him and maybe a little bit more.

He was awakened from his daydream by Olivia who had just arrived and told him:

"Carisi! Go to Barba's office, with the latest info this time he's going to give us that warrant." 

Sonny has been waiting for this all day. He'd gathered enough evidence to convince Barba.

Moments later he was pleading his case in the ADA's office, he knew his arguments were valid, but as usual he couldn't help but beg for Rafael's approval.

"Yes, yes, I know. It pains me to say it, but you're right, Carisi, you're right."

"Huh?"

"Please don't make me say it again. I'm signing these warrants."

Sonny had to hold back from doing a victory dance...

"Carisi!"

"Yes, counselor. Thank you."

"So how are those classes at Fordham going?" Barba asked him as he filled out the paperwork.

Sonny didn't want to talk about it, at the moment he was having trouble concentrating on his classes because the cases were just going on and since Nick left, the workload had doubled. But he didn't want to complain to Rafael, so he decided to lie to him.

"Not too good. I don't have time for my classes since Nick left, I spend most of my time at the precinct."

What? Huh? He didn't mean to say that out loud!

He tried to look confident in his future exam results.

"I'm not sure I'll get my year if this keeps up."

It was terrible, like his mouth refused to listen to his brain.

Did that mean that... no... no... 

Rafael was his soul mate! Rafael was his soul mate! Rafael was his soul mate! Sonny couldn't think straight anymore.

"I'm sorry about that," Rafael replied, "It's hard enough when you're only in school and you Sonny, you're working too, it's admirable. If I can ever help," Rafael said, handing him the warrants.

What? A compliment and an offer of help in the same sentence? What was he getting at?

He looked up in amazement at Rafael.

"I'm sincere. Anything I can do to help."

Sonny was dying to accept. But he didn't want to look incapable in front of the one he was in L... no, he wasn't supposed to think about that.

"I would like-"

Sonny put his hand in front of his mouth.

"Carisi?" Rafael looked worried.

He had to leave. If he stayed he would make a fool of himself.

"I want to stay with y-" he turned around and ran to the door and ran out of the building.

Then he went and sat down further on a bench and took his head in his hands.

And the thoughts went round in his head, he didn't even realize he was talking out loud.

____

Rafael stared for a few seconds at the door that had closed behind Carisi. Then he got up and ran after the young detective, while his thoughts raced.

He couldn't lie to himself any longer. 

He remembered the conversation he had had with his mother when he was 12 years old and asked her what a soul mate was and whether he would ever have one.

_"Rafi mi hijo, one day you will meet your soulmate and when your souls connect through love, you will be unable to do any harm to them, and even better, you will want deep down inside you to do everything to make them happy. But that will only happen if both of your souls connect through love."_

_"And that person will have the same gift?"_

_"Oh, no, she won't. They'll have another gift, your soulmate could never lie to you, even if they wanted to."_

Once Rafael became an adult, he had completely forgotten that story. After all, it was just a children's story from a gullible mother.

But the way he'd reacted to the detective a few minutes ago proved to him it wasn't a legend.

That impulse he had had to admit that Sonny was right, or even later when he had inquired about the progress of his lessons and wanted to help him. These were not typical behaviors for Rafael. 

The connection between their two souls forced him to recognize what he had refused to admit. For some time now his interest in the young detective had been more than professional. Rafael had refused to put a name to it though. However what had just happened forced Rafael to be honest with himself, he had fallen for Sonny.

Sonny, who had shown his worth many times since his arrival... No matter how many times he took rebuffs, he kept going and fighting for what he thought was right.

Sonny who had an understanding of human nature that Rafael had rarely seen in anyone. And a temperament so positive that sometimes Rafael was jealous of it.

At this point in his reflections, Rafael had arrived outside in front of the building's door and looked out. His eyes fell on the silhouette folded on itself on a bench a few feet away. He approached slowly, as if not to frighten him. 

He had had time to understand Sonny's reaction. If they were soul mates and their souls were connected by love - even if the word was a bit difficult to say for Rafael, he couldn't deny it - if that was the case, then Sonny couldn't lie to him. Just as Rafael was feeling this impulse to take care of Sonny right now.

As he approached he heard Sonny mumbling:

"Rafael is my soulmate! How am I going to do it? I almost lost face completely. What will he think if he sees me weak like that? I couldn't even resist! It was as if I wanted to lay my soul completely bare in front of him! But what if he doesn't like what he sees? What if it disgusts him? How am I going to do that when I am in l-"

Rafael shook his head, softened, went and sat down next to Sonny and just put his hand on his back.

"When you are in what?"

"Please don't... not like that..."

Sonny bit his fist to keep the words from coming out.

Rafael took his hand to prevent him from hurting himself.

"Sonny, sonny! Calm down! Calm down! It seems to me that you have forgotten a small part of the soulmate legend. Remind me of the condition in which our gifts manifest themselves, the fact that you can't lie and the fact that I want to take care of you?...".

After a few moments, Rafael saw the understanding coming into Sonny's eyes.

Sonny repeated the words of his Nonna aloud: "If you meet your soulmate, from the day your souls connect with love, you can never lie to him."

Rafael echoed back: "One day you will meet your soulmate, and when your souls connect with love" he insisted on the word, "you will be unable to do them any harm, and better you will want deep down inside you to do everything to make them happy."

"Does that mean you feel the same way I do?" asked Sonny

"I cannot say it, Sonny, since I don't know how you feel." Rafael answered playfully. "Tell me?"

Sonny looked at the ground and said "I love you." His voice was so low that Rafael hardly heard him.

Rafael took his chin and forced him to turn his face towards him. Sonny's eyes shouted uncertainty and Rafael could only reassure him.

"My foolish Sonny, how can you think for one moment that I'm disgusted, that I don't like what I see. Of course I love you too. And I can't lie to you either."

And it wasn't their bond that drove him to kiss the smile that had just appeared on Sonny's lips.

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> As always thank you to SarahCakes613 for beta reading
> 
> Let me know what you think, what moved you or not, what made you laugh or not, what made you cry or not. Whether it's here or on twitter.


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